GlitchSPANKR Review

There’s no getting past how annoying a glitchy game can be, but in their own way, they can often be pretty charming, especially if you’re from the glitchy period best known as the 90s. That’s the kind of nostalgic weirdness that GlitchSPANKR, the latest title from Mahelyk and TheClassifiedX, want you to experience. So, should you ride this glitch to completion, or is it time to try blowing on the floppy disc? 

In GlitchSPANKR, you take on the role of a 12-year-old in the ‘90s who has just managed to sneak a copy of… *sigh* Big Booty Slapper 6, onto their PC. However, when trying to boot up the game, it turns out that a shapeshifting virus named Spunk has taken over. Armed with your GlitchSPANKR anti-virus software, plus a floppy hand on a stick, it’s up to you to track Spunk down and whack him. 

However, not everything is quite as it seems at first, because Spunk has a personality, he’s lonely, sad, and just looking for a friend. So, you have a choice to make: will you destroy him… or perhaps befriend him? 

It’s an interesting plot, with the weirdness really helping it to stand out. The fact that you do have a choice to make pushes for repeat playthroughs, if only to see what changes. Meanwhile, Spunk is a constant presence, always talking your ear off while decrying his situation or insulting you. He’s a charming little virus and can be pretty funny, too. 

Gameplay in GlitchSPANKR is hard to really explain, because it’s both exactly what you would think and yet also not. Essentially, the game starts with you using the spankstick to smack inanimate objects to find Spunk (look, I know how that sounds). Initially, it can be pretty dull, as there doesn’t seem to be much rhyme or reason to where he might be. However, while the core gameplay might not change much, everything else does.

Through the course of GlitchSPANKR, you’ll be sent to weird worlds where nothing is as it seems. You’ll be shrunk to the size of a mouse, sent to a random nightclub, and more. I don’t want to overexplain the places you’ll go or what you’ll be doing, because the best experience is going in blind. Instead, just know that what first appears to be relatively mundane soon becomes much more engaging. 

Graphically, GlitchSPANKR is reminiscent of older games, with a pixelated design that’s surprisingly charming. However, I will say that the spankstick is more distracting than anything. See, while you spank with a button control, the hand moves independently, depending on your character's movement. It can be a bit of a pain when it really starts flailing around, and I couldn’t find the means to turn it off. The music is also pretty catchy, with a retro style that bops when it hits. 

On that note, I should talk about AI usage in the game. Firstly, it doesn’t appear that there are any AI visuals in the game, but the developers do state on Steam that AI has been used sparingly in other areas: 

GlitchSPANKR was handcrafted. We used AI audio sparingly and purposefully:
We remixed our own original tracks into ambient variations (e.g. a French-style version of “Friend”). A handful of songs had lyrics we wrote and used AI to help generate their music, which we refined and often re-recorded ourselves. One minor joke character uses an AI voice by design; one is in the process of being replaced. 

Overall, GlitchSPANKR is a fun, weird, and entertaining journey that’s worth your time. However, as all humour is subjective, you might find that many of the jokes don’t hit as they should, which certainly lessens the experience. Meanwhile, the gameplay is functional, but it’s relatively simple, as the game is more about the journey,  so if you're looking for something to “get good” at, then GlitchSPANKR might not be for you.