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5 Things I Learnt And Will Apply To Dating from Visual Novels and Dating Sims

5 Things I Learnt And Will Apply To Dating from Visual Novels and Dating Sims

So picture this: Valentines is coming, you’ve got a date, they’re an actual living breathing human you haven’t bribed to say you’re dating someone for the night, and they think you’re cute/funny/insert trait you might not have. But “OH NO!”, you’ve been so far out of the dating scene that you’re unsure with what to do with yourself. Dates? What’s that? Is that something put in my calendar? You want to go out again, you want us to be more than just a one time thing? Fret not, dating sims and visual novels are here to rescue you from this impending dating doomsday. Allow me to impart the knowledge you need to know for being that 100% dating model, who knows by the end of it you might have a harem (if you and your partner are consenting, I’m not being held accountable if your desired sex floods your door or demands your underwear).

Lesson 1 - Knock on the damn door before entry!

A small thing, but one that will help you in the long run. You don’t want to accidental walk in on someone, and as much as it’s fanservice material, you will potentially have to find a way to build such a bridge to walk over this blunder. A setback that can easily be resolved just by knocking. Oh and also put a lock on your door, you wouldn’t want the reverse to happen.

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Childhood friend strikes again!

Lesson 2 - There is always a right answer

No word of a lie, there’s a right answer to everything and anything. There’s always a multiple question like quiz, it’s a like a detective game, you’ll practically become a god. You spilt soup? A logical answer. You’re late to the date? A logical answer. And best of all, if your childhood friend starts questioning you. Everything will go badly, and you’ll potentially start a fandom warfare between the main love interest and side interest. But let’s be honest, get rid of your childhood friend otherwise something will be misunderstood and if you have an ex, definitely don’t bring them up. You don’t want to unlock the yandere route, seriously a knife behind or in your back isn’t a good end.

Lesson 3 - Giving gifts is the fastest way to romance someone

Be it socks, clothes, food items, or synthetic yakisoba, something will get into your soon to be lover’s heart. Unless you visit a potion brewer and purchase a love potion, just make sure said brewer is reputable and if they say “you’re not strong enough for my potions”, chances are don’t purchase potions from them. Seriously, don’t, you might walk away with side effects you don’t want. But learn what they’re interested in, and make sure you gift them something very consistently. Be it daily, weekly, or every time you meet. Just make sure they have something to remind them of you. A nice hack is having things ordered on a automated schedule or bulk buying things in advance.

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Gotta schmooze them somehow right?

Lesson 4 - Make sure you match their style

Let’s not beat around a bush, whenever you see a couple they’re like a fashion accessory. So you better dress the part. You’ve been out of the dating scene for a while, and you’ve gotta dress like water, become fluid to their every demand and want. How else are you going to convince them otherwise that you’re a suitable partner for them? You’ve got to dress the part, don’t duplicate what they’re wearing. Dress to make others go “damn, they look a couple, see how they match”, accentuate their style. Never show them up, you’ll lose romance points if you do. Oh, and if you think they’re going to be underdressed, buy them an outfit. Be as dominate or submissive as your would be lover desires basically.

Lesson 5 - The most important, help resolve any problem they have

If you’ve ever touched a visual novel or dating sim, there’s always a problem. This could be emotional, physical, or locked in a cage messed oh-god-my-lover-is-yandere-and-has-locked-me-in-my-room-to-protect-me-from-the-outside-world-bad (thanks Amnesia for the heads-up on that front for sadistic boyfriends). Oh, and be prepared for Mortal Kombat or some form of vengeful ex(es), best have a comfortable weapon at hand. Seriously, you wouldn’t know how many dating sims have had combat encounters where if only the MC knew how to defend themselves, that bad end wouldn’t have been so quick or abrupt. Also, if you’re reading this. Don’t go full yandere on your lover, at least not on the first date, save it for the fifth one at least.

And there you have five totally usable and not at all daft lessons learnt from visual novels and dating sims. There’s just a wealth of knowledge to be learnt from there, and as an added bonus I’m gonna impart a sixth lesson just for you: go and do activities that both you and your lover like doing. It’s one of the best places to farm affection points, and if you’re ever low on them, doing something to wow them like play their favourite song, take them to a concert or something. This article, site, and writer are not responsible for potential love loss, dead people, decapitation, or forms of mutilation and psychological horror imparted from or caused by lessons learnt from videogames.

Valentine's Day
Owen Chan

Owen Chan

Staff Writer

Is at least 50% anime.

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